A blog for people who seek alternative approaches to kiruv and the baal teshuvah experience.
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Not for the Jews Alone
R' Hirsch, intro to commentary on Tehillim
Hyperreligiosity: Identifying and Overcoming Patterns of Religious Dysfunction
R.S. Pearson:
"I must state first of all that I am not
a psychiatrist and this work falls under the realm of "anctedoctal
evidence." Anctedoctal evidence is nonetheless known to be very important in
medical science. In no way should a person who was diagnosed with serious
mental illness by a psychiatrist or psychologist look at this work as being a
substitute for adequate psychiatric or psychological help. I believe it is
fitting that someone who was once diagnosed as hyperreligious should write a
book on this subject rather than someone with no religious belief. A person who
has no religious belief may not understand the gray areas where the religious
person makes certain important actions, which may be seen as sacrifices, for
the benefit of their belief structure. "Hyperreligiosity
is the ill-fitting grasp of the role of religion and God in one's life. It is
the disability that can lead to killing in the name of God, or isolation from
others in the name of religion. Hyperreligiosity happens most often when one thinks
that they know the mind of God, and that one can know all the ways of God. The
Bible is one of the scriptures of the major world religions that clearly states
this is impossible. There are psychological reasons why a person with
hyperreligiosity needs to have the assurance that they know the complete mind of
God.
This book
will explore some of them and some possible ways out of the dysfunctions of
hyperreligiosity. "This is a very
difficult work to write because religion often does great things for people
that can not be easily measured by society. There has been a duality occurring
in some therapeutic communities of those who might be termed
"hyperreligious" by some psychiatrists and therapists and those who
have spent many years in therapy and do not fall under this judgment. Psychiatry
often admits it can't cure people. The very nature of being a part of the
community of a local church on a weekly basis, year after year, is a consistent
social achievement beyond some people's reach. Socializing with the same group
of people on a regular basis is often more than what some who resort to psychiatry
alone can say they have done." continue
reading This is a promotional selection
from the book containing the first twenty-seven pages.
The full
book can be obtained via purchase at Amazon.com and other booksellers. Hyperreligiosity:
Identifying and Overcoming Patterns of Religious Dysfunction R.S. Pearson Books
by the Same Author Non-Fiction: Virtuism: Philosophy and the Aesthetics of
Virtue The Experience of Hallucinations in Religious Practice Exhausting the
Interaction of Words: Computer-automated Brainstorming with ParaMind
Brainstorming Software Fiction: Motivated for the Cause: An Anti-novel Rubber
Blue Biodegradable Robot and other Computer-Generated Writings Cast the Jewels
into the Sea of Your Soul and Evoprayer: Two Short Anti-novels Hyperreligiosity:
Identifying and Overcoming Patterns of Religious Dysfunction R.S. Pearson Telical
Books Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Pearson, Robert Scott.
Hyperreligiosity : identifying and overcoming patterns of religious dysfunction
/ R.S. Pearson LC Control Number: 2005930060 Type of Material: Text (Book,
Microform, Electronic, etc.) 1st edition Seattle, WA : Telical Books, 2005. ISBN:
0-9748139-2-3 Copyright 2005 All Rights Reserved Telical Books P.O. Box 27401 Seattle,
WA 98165-2401 U.S.A. Table of Contents Introduction Numbered Texts This book is
for educational purposes only.
This book does
not pretend to be a cure for mental illness. Therefore, if one does not feel
mentally healthy, one should seek professional help instead of using this book
for serious therapy. I must state first of all that I am not a psychiatrist or
psychologist and I wrote this as a way of describing my own healing journey
from hyperreligiosity. This book sometimes uses psychological terminology
because I believe it is helpful for all people to understand psychological
concepts. Introduction I must state first of all that I am not a psychiatrist
and this work falls under the realm of "anctedoctal evidence." Anctedoctal
evidence is nonetheless known to be very important in medical science. In no
way should a person who was diagnosed with serious mental illness by a
psychiatrist or psychologist look at this work as being a substitute for
adequate psychiatric or psychological help. I believe it is fitting that someone
who was once diagnosed as hyperreligious should write a book on this subject
rather than someone with no religious belief.
A person who
has no religious belief may not understand the gray areas where the religious
person makes certain important actions, which may be seen as sacrifices, for
the benefit of their belief structure. Hyperreligiosity is the ill-fitting
grasp of the role of religion and God in one's life. It is the disability that
can lead to killing in the name of God, or isolation from others in the name of
religion. Hyperreligiosity happens most often when one thinks that they know
the mind of God, and that one can know all the ways of God. The Bible is one of
the scriptures of the major world religions that clearly states this is
impossible. There are psychological reasons why a person with hyperreligiosity needs
to have the assurance that they know the complete mind of God. This book will
explore some of them and some possible ways out of the dysfunctions of
hyperreligiosity. This is a very difficult work to write because religion often
does great things for people that can not be easily measured by society. There
has been a duality occurring in some therapeutic communities of those who might
be termed "hyperreligious" by some psychiatrists and therapists and
those who have spent many years in therapy and do not fall under this judgment.
Psychiatry often admits it can't cure people.
The very
nature of being a part of the community of a local church on a weekly basis,
year after year, is a consistent social achievement beyond some people's reach.
Socializing with the same group of people on a regular basis is often more than
what some who resort to psychiatry alone can say they have done. It is hard
writing a book on hyperreligiosity when you yourself know that you have aspects
of it. The worse thing for the hyperreligious is to feel that they are somehow
causing another person to be less religious. Instead, in solving the problem of
hyperreligiosity in a person, one opens that person up for true religion, or
better, true spirituality.
At times, in
discussing one's hyperreligiosity, one may seem like one is trying to sound
like a saint. But when one sees the problems associated with it, the listener
begins to perceive that this is not the case. One begins to wonder how good of
a life this is that we have chosen. This book is in no way an attempt to help
people become less religious or spirituality-centered in their thinking. In
fact, it is the opposite, an attempt to empower spiritual people away from the
disempowering ideas found along the spiritual path. The word
"hyperreligious" seems like it might seem to mean "very
religious" or "ultra spiritual" in the way that we picture the qualities
of a superhero. Hyperreligiosity can happen when the outer form that true
spirituality flows through becomes distorted to the extent that it becomes the
sole focus. Instead of people being more loving, helpful to others, and filled
with what they experience as God's nature to help them in their life, they become
suspicious, isolated, and full of an untrue image of God that they can mold to
their personal desires. A type of hyperreligiosity can also happen when
political groups use religious beliefs as a dividing line in the exercise of power,
as a way to build sides so that other aims can be achieved. Hence political
leaders in the past have called on the demon that is hyperreligiosity to awaken
in the people so that war could be more easily approved. When hyperreligiosity
does not exist in a person, there usually has to be very, very strong reasons
to justify war to a human being, especially one that concerns oneself with
religious thinking. Hyperreligiosity produces painful results in the way other mental
illnesses produce painful results. It is the mental illness that seems
officially sanctioned by God to the person who has it. It can be difficult
reading this subject matter if you have been afflicted by hyperreligiosity in
any way. One may begin to feel anger, even negativity. Temporarily, this state
can be a better place to be. It is taking the chance at maturing as an adult, instead
being caught up in acting out the Biblical admonition of being "like
little children" to not just God in heaven, but to everyone, in every
circumstance. If there is a better understanding of hyperreligiosity, many of
the problems of the world can be further solved. But for a religious person to
even admit the term "hyperreligiosity" as a valid term, is itself
difficult. People talk about the changes that need to take place as changes in
the heart, but religious texts such as the Bible, do not limit it in such a
way. There needs to be a growth of wisdom, a growth of intellectual
understanding of truth, for the world to change. Understanding that religious action
is not always fruitful is a part of that knowledge and in fact much of the
Bible itself discusses this. My disclaimer to this book is that if a person’s
religion brings them to a state of being that one becomes like a Mother Teresa
or an Albert Schweitzer, and truly helps many other people, that is wonderful.
I would never make an argument against that type of behavior, only encourage
it. I believe it is such individuals that caused the evolution of humanity throughout
time. This work examines not so much how religion works miraculously in some
people's lives, but instead focuses on when it works disastrously in others. I
would be just as happy to write about religion's virtues because I strongly
believe in religion and its ability to produce all the virtues. I noticed that
there is not much written on this subject of religious mental illness by people
who still uphold religious beliefs. I am in no way trying to make people
"less religious" who have hyperreligiosity. Making Mother Teresa less
religious probably would have also made her less helpful to the starving people
of India. The aim is to find a way to free what religion actually is about and
to know what the form of mental illness and societal dysfunction that hides in
a religious costume is. The result will be freeing those with sincere religious
desires to become more active in following the true spiritual life. There will
be no limit to the time or money commitment such a life may have, but it will
be free from the psychological shackles that this book describes. The
hyperreligious notion of God can be a frightening one. It is a God that holds
good things from people, and who demands that people live for religion, instead
of having one's own life improved by religion. Some might think that their hyperreligiosity
is justified by the Biblical command to love God with all one's heart, all
one's mind and all one's strength. This book explores dysfunctional faith, that
is, why a person can't love God with all their heart or all their mind or all
their strength. If a person really loves God with all their mind, they may
begin to see that the reason they are not like other people isn't necessarily
because they are more spiritual, but may be because they were more abused by
others and created defense mechanisms against this abuse. Religious texts
themselves have a balance written in them that helps prevent a person from
developing hyperreligiosity. The Gospels mention how Jesus taught us to not
judge each other. Inherent in hyperreligiosity is the need of eliminating in others
certain types of value and to only see certain values as existing in
themselves. It is like the way the psychotic who may have come from a situation
in which their value was threatened, creates a magical world by delusion of
grandeur in which they now have great value to others. The hyperreligious has
become threatened in their world and disempowered by people, and so they
develop the need to devalue others and create value in themselves by their
religious practice. But such can never be the basis of the spirituality
religion tells us God wants, as we can read in the various scriptures. Religion
does teach us that God hears and answers our prayers, gives us strength, and
the like. The hyperreligious get stuck in this mode of trying to live in this life
of favor, and to do so they must judge others in their mind as unworthy,
especially when they have been abused by others. One can use this book as a
part of one's spiritual arsenal when or if religion becomes unnecessarily a
painful and hindering thing in one's life. It can be a note in one's song but
not one's whole song. Numbered Texts 1 A famous founder of a religion, Jesus
Christ, said, "I come that you may have life more abundantly." There
is much in the Bible about having the good in life, being “the head not the
tail,” being prosperous, and so on. There are also some things in the Bible
about self-sacrifice, about martyrs who "did not love their life till the
end." A person prone to hyperreligiosity has to personally come to a
balance in their life where they can see that many of the self-sacrificial
messages they are getting in their mind are not spiritual, but in fact are
destructive. For some people who want their lives to point in that direction,
there are circumstances when self-sacrificial impulses are spiritual and even
heroic. If one has a great cause and finds he must essentially sacrifice his
life to it, I see nothing wrong in that. The problem lies in making sacrifices
to a cause that is not good enough. I feel this is most often the problem in
mental health areas that have religious overtones. 2 If the hyperreligious
could take into account the lowest and most painful scenarios of human life and
try to act like a Christ to them, few could call that person hyperreligious.
Even those who are not religious might call that person doing a great work of
social service. Hyperreligiosity can be seen as a condition that produces no
value for oneself or others. If something is producing real value for others,
then it can be said that the person creating the value is consciously attaining
an aim. Much of value was done in history by people whom the religious, and
even the general public, calls saints, and who led self-sacrificial lives. This
kind of self-sacrifice is not wrong, if such people have had a healing effect
on society. Butler's "Lives of the Saints" contains many such
accounts of saints who set-up schools, hospitals, and created favorable
economic situations in their towns. In fact, such individuals created much of
the progress on Earth. 3 The hyperreligious need to be cautious in what they perceive
as God's answers to prayer. This is similar to the faith in the idea that the
force of "gentleness" is going to solve all their problems. It is
probably beyond most people's ability to love in such a great way that such
love would cause them to be somehow martyred. Those who really love are not
insulated from the real social world in the way that mental illness often separates
people from that world. The loving that is said to lead to spiritual freedom,
by people becoming one with the true spirit of God, is loving people outside
of, and regardless of, the various aspects of power needed to climb the
religious political order. God is said to live in that kind of love. 4 I do not
disbelieve in the traditional body of spiritual literature that talks highly of
self-sacrifice and clinging closely to God. I think it is largely religious
motivation that has made life as good as it is. Yet, it seems like everything
on this Earth, the religious life can be stretched out of proportion. Food
brings us pleasure and is essential to life, yet many people are in poor health
and develop illness because of overeating. The same things can be said for
aspects of religion in certain people. When one tries to mold religion into a
tool that one can use in any way one wishes, one sets up a dangerous process
that can even slide into unconscious behaviors that one can not witness. The religious
always must remember that God is in control, not them. Obeying some basic
religious framework like the Ten Commandments in all one does is a good way to
keep this in mind. 5 A healing therapy for the hyperreligious is to expose themselves
to ideas about their sense of responsibility in the world. This healing sense
of responsibility helps one live one's life under the laws of logic and not
under self-deluding ideas, such as making God into one's personal butler of
miracles. This is not to say that a healing sense of aloneness and solitude doesn't
show a blessing from God. Most religious people know from personal experience
that God does give one a comforting peaceful feeling in being alone. 6 God gave
us certain attributes which we can hang our self-esteem on. For true healing
and recovery, people often find themselves able to accept these in themselves.
Dysfunctional religion can cause certain people to deny all these attributes in
themselves. They can't have the ability to feel like they have these attributes
and also live a life in their sense of religion. We are created to feel good
about various things such as having health, financial security, a good
personality or friendliness, attractiveness or intelligence. The hyperreligious
who has these qualities deny themselves the ability to feel good about having them
because they are seen as a type of pride. Because they can no longer feel
positive about having these qualities, they then begin to feel that they are
the opposite of these things. This is similar to body dysmorphic disorder,
where attractive or average looking people feel that they are ugly and
deformed. There are a whole range of ways to avoid accepting that one has the
attributes of a normal person. The prolonging of this nonacceptance of one's
own virtue, if held long enough, can erode the sense of self and is said to be
the cause of psychotic breakdowns and grandiosity. 7 Traditional psychology
teaches that having a meaningful relationship with the opposite sex, is a test
of a person's psychological health and maturity. The hyperreligious often expect
God to give them someone in marriage very similar to them in many respects, and
they wait for such a person without initiating much of the usual courtship
routines. Some seem to need to exhaust the action of giving God more than what
He wants, as if His response is "Go do something else besides religion and
you'll have your prayers answered. Just go do the thing you're praying
for." 8 The hyperreligious should give themselves more exposure to
"mainstream" understanding of religion and see where that leads. It
seems only fair and just that they give themselves this experience. Perhaps
then the virtues of peace, joy and love will make themselves better known, and
some who are prone to having anger toward God will find this also fall away. 9 The
hyperreligious must finally realize that their old ways of understanding their
relationship to religious concepts are not going to be the catalyst for their
dysfunctional religious patterns to cease. Their old ways are not going to help
them really break free from dysfunctional religion and have a better life. They
would need a whole blueprint of how they should be thinking to achieve the life
they want. Since they do see a mature godly character to be a main ingredient
for a complete life, and can continue to use this rule, they need to understand
what the historical prerequisites for a godly character are. Granted, this may
not be the same as a canonized saint or martyr's character, but in reality when
one examines all the so-called pride and lack of humility many mental patients
are trapped by their own infantile grandiosity into having, they can see that
the selfopinion that they themselves have the character of a saint is most likely
self-delusional. 10 No structure of any society is fashioned to indulge those who
want something like a saint's disposition and also all their other human
desires met. To some hyperreligious, only "evil" is rewarded by the
monetary gain necessary to support oneself. A scrupulous moral worldview only
works for those who must self-justify themselves when, all the while, their
"evil" society never justifies them. 11 Life can be seen as an
abstraction beyond what any person upholds, an abstraction that has self-check
mechanisms to guide people when they are out of balance. All in some sense are
victims of this and can only be freed by humility, from feeling the pangs of
disappointment. But in the hyperreligious, the mind can continuously
philosophize self-justification and excuses in a lack of humility to adhere to
psychic comfort in old patterns. 12 Some hyperreligious men believe in staying
a "boy man" just as some hyperreligious women believe in staying
immature to not act like mature people in the outside world which they perceive
as evil. Women, however, find masculine traits attractive, yet it's almost
impossible for the hyperreligious "boy man" to justify masculine
traits, even before a God of mercy and compassion. A catch-22 is that many
modern women state they want a sensitive man but a sensitive man is often seen
as weak, especially compared to many modern women who are equipped for life
without a man in modern society. Those hyperreligious men born past the
baby-boom generation who were taught growing up that they should be sensitive
males need to understand the balance of traits between accepting their
qualities which instinctively make them attractive to women, and understand the
new modern women who is striving for equality. This is why many hyperreligious
can not find a mate. The hyperreligious man is afraid of the masculinity that
by historical definition risks offense. 13 One can postulate a grid of forces
and characteristics in human life that fill the entire real needs in society.
Some people have the bravery to construct skyscrapers. Some people have the nerve
to open human bodies and perform surgery. Some need the sensitivity to
construct beautiful music, and so on. There are many people who can't
understand that the small traits in people that help make up these different
psychologies in people do not make them less spiritual or benevolent, only
different. The wisdom of the aphorism, "It takes all kinds of people to
make a world," is often not understood by the hyperreligious because their
psychology is set up to reward only people of a certain disposition. 14 Some
topics in the study of the dysfunctional religious: 1) The tendency of a person
dedicating their life to religion and their perception of God is to expect in
some way that God is protecting them. Sometimes things are worse in the world
than what we like to expect. Our views should not be childish in this regard.
Bad things happen to good people. Spiritual texts teach us to be "wise as
serpents but gentle as doves." For instance, hyperreligious people often
can not detect when religious leaders are in fact abusive and corrupt.
Likewise, those who are not attracted to religious groups may not see when
their own ideas are self-abusive and corrupting the quality of their own life. 2)
We should be careful what we believe supernatural forces do for us verses what
we are responsible to do for ourselves. A good example of this is that even
Creationists believe that some aspects of evolution are correct. God can be seen
as creating the world but putting it on a "long leash" in the same
way that God seemed to let some aspects of evolution change various natures of
animal life on Earth. God created us and helps us, but expects us to live our
lives and show what type of character we have by what choices we make. The hyperreligious
tend to look at life as a man walking on stilts, with one leg being himself,
and one leg being God, each event in their life as trading causative agents,
one caused by himself, the next caused by God, or angel or demon, and so on. 3)
God will not punish the hyperreligious for trying to understand what they are
doing wrong in their religious systems and trying to have a good life and
getting better, but basic spiritual concepts can not be thrown out in this
attempt. Growth for the hyperreligious is not to become meaner to others, or to
live for periods of their life without thoughts of God. One has to strike a
balance, and for the hyperreligious, this takes extra knowledge and work,
probably trial and error. One can't tread on basic human decency and standards
of psychological maturity in the name of deserving a change. 4) The effects of
Hyperreligiosity are related to how OCD, BDD and other potentially lethal
mental illnesses destroy the quality of life. The hyperreligious should not
allow religious ideas to justify conditions of mental illness by saying,
"I'm just being holy." When the hyperreligious uses religion as a
real help to help them overcome other types of mental illness, they may see
that since they had some problems with their other mental illness, these
problems may reflect in how they might have a problem understanding healthy
religious thinking. 5) The religious must have sophisticated thinking tools to know
whether "psychic" abilities or abilities to detect God or the supernatural
are actually lowering the quality of one's life, or are in fact really
spiritual experiences. 15 There are two levels of abilities that effect a
person in their life. There is the level of their own abilities, and there is
the level of the abilities needed in life to achieve their needs in life. Here
is one possible graph of what they might be like in a person: ======= level of
competence one needs to get one's needs achieved in life ====== level of
oneself due to operating in hyperreligiosity, often manifesting as the making
of excuses that "God didn't do this for me yet" or "God does not
want this for me." Other types of mental illness also follow this model. 16
To the hyperreligious, the excuses of always knowing explicitly the exclusive
will of God, or of feeling entitled to have God do things for them even without
prayer, can create a multitude of problems. For instance, one might feel
because of their hyperreligious tendencies that God does want them married.
However, they may find it impossible to control their sexual drives and they
may have a string of short relationships, breaking them up when they
"finally realize" that God does not want them married or that God
wants them to marry someone more dedicated to religion. 17 It is hard for the
hyperreligious to not have religious books make them what is known as
egodystonic, that is, negatively affect their coping strategies in life.
Instead of seeing these books as beautiful and meaningful, unconsciously they may
see them as a stumbling block in helping them create the life they want. This
is because the hyperreligious religious aspirant doesn't look at these book’s
stronger words against "sinners" as possibly pointing only towards
the many in life who are not religious at all, and often really don't live
rightly, but instead they are driven by their make-up to beat themselves up personally
with these teachings. Understanding human nature better may help them overcome
this. 18 Christianity can be made psychologically symbolic, that is, almost
everything in Christianity can be said to be about life here and now and to
bring a person to a type of the kingdom of Heaven on Earth by following its
principles. Often sermons focus on aspects of how Christianity works on a
psychological level. But Christianity cannot be made wholly psychologically symbolic,
and in these subjects of Heaven and Hell, the saved and the damned, good and
evil, are often where the hyperreligious loses touch with sanity. 19 There is a
problem regarding the religious practice of stillness that is seen in esoteric
and Eastern traditions. It is knowing what to be still about and what to be
active about. Practicing stillness would obviously be an accessory to “sins of omission”
in certain situations. If evil flourishes when good men do nothing, and if good
men are merely sitting quietly for five hours a day in their rooms as their
sole spiritual practice, then obviously there are conflicts among people in
what different people understand as spiritual. 20 The hyperreligious may feel
very alive when they fight their hyperreligiosity. God may not help us so much
through magical thinking, but God will help us through constructive thinking.
Whether something involves magical thinking or constructive thinking can make a
litmus test of how well a hyperreligious person is doing in their therapy. It
may guide them to feel good about things when they are thinking in a less "magical
thinking" mode and indicate what type of response they can expect for what
they want in life. 21 The whole structure of cause-and-effect must often be rebuilt
by the hyperreligious. Some of the things they expected God would do, they must
take responsibility for and do themselves. This isn't to say they can't pray,
but their expectation of God must be humble. They should treat demanding or
even expecting certain events from divine sources the way an alcoholic treats
alcohol. If they actually need more money, to do something like take a
long-needed vacation, why do they focus their prayer life on gratitude to God
when the Bible just as clearly states that we are to be anxious for nothing and
pray for all our needs? The normal religious idea is to be liberal in one's prayer
life for such things. The hyperreligious feels above normal or wealthy people,
and therefore can not even usually pray directly for more money or
opportunities to make more money by honest work. 22 When ideas go against words
from spiritual books, we must remember that those words are being interpreted
by people's minds. Saying "God is love" can only have one interpretation:
love is easily understandable to man. Loving people would very rarely choose to
make one person suffer so that others can benefit. Often, focusing on the life
of Jesus, the hyperreligious see all their suffering as having some kind of meaning
for other people. People who suffer believing this delusion have a type of
pride, and are freed by humility. The hyperreligious might not ascribe their
suffering to some symbolic mystical act, but instead to some art or writing
they are creating. One way for the latter hyperreligious to overcome this is to
tell them it is important to note in studying geniuses who achieved post-humous
fame, that often they had some degree of recognition in their lifetime.
Geniuses, like Van Gogh and Kafka, who did not have any success at all during
their life are rare, although a small minority usually do have to suffer when
they are aware of future patterns before the majority can understand such
patterns. 23 Going to church faithfully does not always produce a good quality
of life. It's not hard to find the evidence to back up this statement. Priests,
even though serving mass, also abused children. Christianity has been practiced
for two thousand years but it has yet to produce a Golden Age on Earth nor did
its founder ever claim it would. Much like any other major religious system on
Earth, nations that followed it did not always treat the weak and handicapped
with respect, nor did they respect people regardless of race or nationality.
These are all things that have happened as Western society seemingly became
more secular. It doesn't mean Western society became less spiritual, it may
mean that avenues of a type of societal hyperreligiosity have been thwarted.
These improvements were, however, still largely guided by leaders who had
strong religious convictions. Often it was people of great Christian faith,
people of great inner achievement, who were the leaders in such improvements. 24
To think that God develops the life we want to lead as the result of simply
expecting Him to give it to us, and in the amount of time when we are still
somewhat young enough to enjoy it and have a long life, is to play a risky game
of chance. What we may need are lessons that any given church does not easily
preach. The gifts of God come more likely from a type of character-building
process where the results of a life of prayer and obedience are seen. One can't
have a self-serving system of justification and projecting onto others one's
own faults. One has to make sacrifices of their own superiority complexes to
find humility not just before God, but before other men. 25 A hyperreligious
person has to fully change his or her thinking into the conviction that the
good one experiences when one fights his or her hyperreligiosity is actually
also seen as good by God. This change is the enshrinement of one's new understanding
regarding the understanding that one does have hyperreligiosity to be part of
the good plan of God that saved them from so many bad things. Too much of a
medicine is not a good thing. One can never be too spiritual, but too much of
the outer forms of religion is not always a good thing. This is not like saying
that one shouldn't sacrifice large amounts of their income for others, or even
do something drastic like risk one's life for one's neighbor. All those things
can be done by people who are not even very religious at all but are guided by
a strong personal morality. 26 Religion commands us not to judge, but the hyperreligious
often remember those parts of religious writings that are concerned with
judgment. The hyperreligious probably is not psychologically enabled to
understand the practicality of the idea of not judging, nor do they understand
how not judging could possibly be a religious idea. That is, there is something
in judging others that relieves them of the pressure of self-criticism that was
inflicted on them by other human beings. Not judging becomes the one religious
commandment they comfortably overlook. 27 The only definition of God that has
any merit in being a definition that good and competent people also share is a definition
that states that God is love. This in fact is a definition that comes directly
from the Bible. The hyperreligious put themselves in uncomfortable situations
when they expect something from a God who is love and do not get it. Their
actual definition of God is probably a definition that has not been carefully
examined by careful analysis. 28 Those who are hyperreligious and take an
attitude against the dominant religion of their culture have to make sure they
are properly educated first in the things of their native culture. Many
hyperreligious people, as can be seen in the many Westerners who have been a
part of destructive Eastern-based cults, tend to have formed negative opinions
of the Judeo- Christian religion based on a mythological idea of the “noble savage”
or some variation of it. Many people do not understand that ancient human
history was full of barbarism and they criticize the Old Testament against a
standard of ethics that in practice is only quite recent. The Old Testament had
to address severe human barbarism and so its standards often don't sound very
high when measured in a world that has had it's redeeming influence (although
of course people will argue this) for approximately three thousand years. These
people may point to the fact that there are even older religious tracts that
spoke of treating neighbors with respect in these foreign cultures, but there
are also widespread cases of barbarism in such Eastern cultures (see the book
“Oriental Despotism.” by Karl A. Wittfogel (Yale University Press, 1967), to
understand that Eastern cultures are inherently no more spiritually governed than
Western ones). These facts are often overlooked by such people in a type of
reverse-ethnocentricity. This imbalanced thinking often sets them up to follow
goals which may not be logical. Truth becomes a hidden quality, very rare,
since the mother culture didn’t have very much of it. This can manifest in what
is known as “spiritual titanism,” or the following of human beings as God
incarnate. Their thinking may believe: “Since there is so little truth, why
isn’t this obscure person really God?” (Spiritual Titanism: Indian, Chinese,
and Western Perspectives. Nicholas F. Gier). 29 Religious scrupulosity always
devours a person's real needs for the sake of illusion and even a type of
narcissism. The illusion fulfills the sense of wish fulfillment that Freud has shown
to be a way of placating the actual need. The imagination provides that
fulfillment of the actual need by creating an illusion to believe in. A
hyperreligious person's narcissism allows them to have self-esteem when society
can often deny the hyperreligious any esteem. 30 A definition of God must have
all kinds of good qualities to it because it can too easily be unconsciously
interchanged with the definition of any authority structure such as one's
parents, one's state/political governing structure, cruel school teachers, and
so on. Some people have the psychological need to depend on a magical situation
occurring in their life instead of one based on the normal laws of life and
logic. This makes them unable to drink of the reality of God into their being;
a God of love who safely allows them their free will, or a God who heals
disease instead of causes it. It makes them unable to act in large areas of life,
like getting married, because they wait for God to "give" them a
spouse. They believe God is preventing them from being married when it may be
their own psychological immaturity that prevents them. We can not say that God
does not prefer some to be single and therefore may prevent some from marriage,
but the Bible does say that marriage is honorable among all and "he who
finds a wife finds a good thing" implying free volition. It also condemns
those who demand abstinence from marriage as heretical and demonic. The fact of
the matter is, getting married, especially in modern times, often takes some
form of psychological health and maturity, relatively speaking. If a hyperreligious
person does not have such a nature, they can invent the excuse that God does
not want them married and feel psychologically invulnerable. In truth, like
many great artists, the drive to be religious can take all one's mental effort
just like being a great artist often eclipses marriage in those who give all their
life to their art. 31 The very idea of the miraculous can hold the hyperreligious
back from being healed from their mental illness. The hyperreligious often
makes opportunity for the miraculous in every aspect of life. Such a person
must understand that a lack of waiting for some miracles to happen in one's
life is not synonymous with a lack of faith or spirituality. A good rule of thumb
here is that the biggest miracle in life is the miracle done by God in turning
a person around, that is, making an alcoholic sober, or helping a criminal live
a good life. These are real miracles that happen to people every day and can be
seen as a type of miracle because more often than not, they do not happen to
other people who are just like these people. Allowing a person to open the
space in their life where God can heal them of their dysfunctional religious
nature is a major therapeutic goal and can be a part of life that we call the
miraculous. 32 If the hyperreligious do not operate under the laws of logic,
they may find themselves waiting on God in vain to do certain things in their
life. The hyperreligious won't see the logical outcome or explanation of many
events because they believe doing so denies the power and reality of God by at
least overshadowing or replacing God in some way. It is this antilogic paradigm
that many hyperreligious live under. Living under such a belief structure
allows one to not have to deal with one's reality, for one can have an excuse,
one can even have God to blame when things don't work out. Ultimately, the hyperreligious
may be entrenched in their hyperreligiosity because they can't stand to witness
their own personal shortcomings, yet exactly what are short comings can be very
subjective, because the mature spiritual person must be seen to be a different
type of person than the average person. Many, such as Pitirim Sorokin in his
book "The Ways and Power of Love," have done studies in this area,
showing that lives wholly given over to the power of love can develop many
exceptional traits of great value. 33 The hyperreligious have felt a deep pain
by experiencing their own failure. They were forced to feel this pain, forced
to feel the untruth that failing means a deep and unbearable humiliation so
they have decided to make themselves omnipotent by having God on their side at
all times. They even act as the special agent of God against the very rules of
God, as in the case of those who believe they hear God tell them to kill. 34 The
hyperreligious must be careful not to demonize past spouses or lovers when
those spouses or lovers go against them. In doing this, the hyperreligious
assumes that they themselves have merged with the perfection of God. Always
occupying one's thoughts with God does not equate with becoming more spiritual.
One might say this is more from occupying one's thoughts with helping one's
neighbor, who may become a type of enemy to the hyperreligious as the result of
a classic obsessional defense mechanism. 35 When spouses or significant others
fail to see the great results of a life lived so close to God, the
hyperreligious do not personally feel offended, but instead sees this as a
proof that God does not want them married, for why else would He send such
negative people in their life to be their partner? If God wanted them to be
married, surely He would have sent them a subservient partner who had exactly
the same beliefs as they. 36 Psychoanalytic thinking is one of the gems of
man's achievements when it can be done in a way that doesn't outwardly deny
normal religious understanding. Unfortunately, for many hyperreligious people,
it is seen as a type of ideological nemesis. This too must most likely be
overcome for the hyperrreligious to progress and mature. One way this may happen
is for them to realize that there never was an ideal religious society before
the birth of psychology, so in this way psychology is not at fault. Also,
psychology has been able to treat people with respect who were even more
stigmatized in the past than they are today. 37 Freedom from hyperreligiosity
comes from knowing that God's greatest blessing and desire for one is to be
more free from the unnecessary suffering in life, and to enjoy life more and
feel more peace. For instance, it is not good to be neurotic all month just for
the sake of trying to help someone once a month. One shouldn't need a month of
neurosis to do one good deed. The writer of religious scriptures states that
God's ways are not man's ways and are above and more holy than man's ways, and that
God's way is to be loving of all people. To love life and to have joy is the
possibility that develops when one is following God's way. Man's way is often
to be hyperreligious: to be burdened by unnecessary suffering to the point that
we have to make a God that we can form in our own image out of just a few deadly
religious verses. And, like it says in the Bible, "the letter of the law
killeth, but the spirit giveth life” (2 Cor. 3:6).
Sunday, December 22, 2013
More on hyperreligiousity
self-esteem on. For true healing and recovery, people often find
themselves able to accept these in themselves. Dysfunctional
religion can cause certain people to deny all these attributes in
themselves. They can't have the ability to feel like they have
these attributes and also live a life in their sense of religion. We
are created to feel good about various things such as having
health, financial security, a good personality or friendliness,
attractiveness or intelligence. The hyperreligious who has these
qualities deny themselves the ability to feel good about having
them because they are seen as a type of pride. Because they can
no longer feel positive about having these qualities, they then
begin to feel that they are the opposite of these things. This is similar to body dysmorphic disorder, where attractive or
average looking people feel that they are ugly and deformed.
There are a whole range of ways to avoid accepting that one has
the attributes of a normal person. The prolonging of this nonacceptance
of one's own virtue, if held long enough, can erode
the sense of self and is said to be the cause of psychotic
breakdowns and grandiosity."
R.S. Pearson
Rav Kook: Vayeira: Combating Evil
RavKookTorah.org
written by Chanan Morrison
(posted with permission)
Vayeira: Combating Evil
A careful reading of the Torah's account clearly indicates that Lot did not deserve to be saved on his own merits alone:
"When God destroyed the cities of the plain, God remembered Abraham; and He sent out Lot from the upheaval when He overturned the cities in which Lot lived." (Gen. 19:29)
Why was Lot not rescued on the basis of his own merits? He certainly did not participate in the infamous Sodomite cruelty towards visitors. Why was he allowed to escape only because "God remembered Abraham"?
Challenging Sodom
The need for God to destroy Sodom shows the importance of chesed (kindness) in our world. It demonstrated the extent of ruin that results from a society lacking this critical trait.
In any ideological conflict, opposition to a particular position can take one of two forms. Some people may reject a position on the basis of its expected consequences. But if they only denounce and point out its negative aspects, they are only partially confronting the objectionable position. True opposition is only achieved when we can present a positive alternative that promises to govern society in a better and more just fashion.
The problem with Sodom was not just that the people of Sodom were cruel. Rather, the very fabric of the Sodomite society was corrupt, based on their abhorrence of kindness. They based their municipal regulations on an ideology of selfishness and self-interest.
Lot and Abraham
To combat Sodom, it was not enough to merely reject their philosophy. It was necessary to present a comprehensive blueprint for a society guided by the traits of kindness and generosity.
Lot rejected the cruel ways of Sodom. By virtue of his association with Abraham, Lot recognized the importance of chesed. On a private level, he invited strangers and tried to protect them. But Lot was unable to present an alternative vision of society based on kindness.
Abraham, on the other hand, was a different story. His whole life was centered on developing and promoting the ideal of chesed. Abraham established chesed as a fixed and organized trait for both the individual and the community. As God Himself testified,
"For I have known [Abraham], that he will command his children and his household after him, and they will keep God's ways, doing righteousness and justice." (Gen. 18:19)
For this reason, Lot did not deserve to be saved from Sodom on his own merits. Unlike his uncle Abraham, he presented no alternative vision, and did not properly contest the Sodomite ideology of cruelty.
How to Fight Evil
This is an important lesson for us. Our rejection of ideologies that contradict the Torah's ethical ideals should not be limited to negative criticism. It is insufficient to merely point out the harmful or false aspects of an ill-conceived plan. Rather, we need to open an offensive front by presenting a positive outlook based on true values - just as Abraham and his vision of chesed stood in direct opposition to the Sodomites' philosophy of egocentric cruelty.
(Gold from the Land of Israel, pp. 46-48. Adapted from Ein Eyah vol. II, p. 250)
RavKookTorah.org This Dvar Torah: VAYERA65.htm
-----------------------------
Do we only criticize the world or do we make something better too? Are we a kindly community? I'll let you answer for yourself.
Thursday, December 12, 2013
Across the spectrum: Moshe Shmuel Glasner
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moshe_Shmuel_Glasner
Monday, December 9, 2013
Rabbi Chaim Hirschensohn
Rabbi Chaim Hirschensohn (1857 – 1935) was born in Tzfat, (city in the Galilee, Israel), to Rabbi Yaakov Mordechai Hirschensohn, who had emigrated there fromPinsk in 1848. In 1864, the family (which included Chaim's older brother, Rabbi Yitzchok Hirschensohn) moved to Jerusalem.
wikipedia.org
Friday, December 6, 2013
The Toxicity of Feminism
"You never turned around to see the frowns on the jugglers and the clowns
When they all come down and did tricks for you
You never understood that it ain't no good
You shouldn't let other people get your kicks for you
You used to ride on the chrome horse with your diplomat
Who carried on his shoulder a Siamese cat
Ain't it hard when you discover that
He really wasn't where it's at
After he took from you everything he could steal.
How does it feel?"That's feminism. It seems so liberating and glamorous and clever. But it's really taking everything it can steal. The feminists, like many demagogues, make a living screwing with your head. They get positions in women's studies departments. They write books and give lectures. They get the thrill of undermining all of society and history. For an intellectual, there is no greater thrill. But they need an audience. And that is all of us, who sit there buying their nonsense, unraveling our families and our destinies.
Sunday, December 1, 2013
Different Approach for Tinuk S'nishba
Friday, November 29, 2013
Rav Kook on “Light unto the nations” Now or After Moshiach
Rav Kook on “Light unto the nations” Now or After Moshiach
Mikeitz: Joseph and Judah
(posted with permission) Sapphire from the Land of Israel
|
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
The hardest job
Fred Astaire
Sunday, November 24, 2013
More on hyperreligiosity
thinking into the conviction that the good one experiences when
one fights his or her hyperreligiosity is actually also seen as good
by God. This change is the enshrinement of one's new
understanding regarding the understanding that one does have
hyperreligiosity to be part of the good plan of God that saved
them from so many bad things. Too much of a medicine is not a
good thing. One can never be too spiritual, but too much of the
outer forms of religion is not always a good thing. This is not like
saying that one shouldn't sacrifice large amounts of their income
for others, or even do something drastic like risk one's life for
one's neighbor. All those things can be done by people who are
not even very religious at all but are guided by a strong personal
morality."
R.S. Pearson
.
Wednesday, November 13, 2013
Vayishlach: Jacob Arrived Whole
Torah of Rav Kook - Vayishlach: Jacob Arrived Whole, adapted by Chanan Morrison
(posted with permission) Gold from the Land of Israel
Having survived the trickery of uncle Laban and the enmity of his brother Esau, Jacob finally returned to his homeland.
"Jacob arrived whole (shalem) to the city of Shechem in the land of Canaan" (Gen. 33:18).
In what way was Jacob "shalem"? The Talmud explains that he was "whole in body, whole in money, whole in his Torah knowledge" (Shabbat 33b).
According to the medieval commentator Rashi, these three areas are directly related to Jacob's previous ordeals. Physically - Jacob healed from the lameness the stranger had afflicted upon him in their mysterious struggle at Peniel. Financially - he did not lack money, despite the expensive gifts he had offered this brother Esau. And spiritually - he had not forgotten his Torah learning, despite the long years of intensive labor at Laban's house.
Jacob's Holistic Perspective
In truth, Jacob's wholeness was not to be found in any quantitative accomplishments. It could not be measured by how fast he could run, by how many sheep he owned, or by the number of scholarly discussions he had memorized. Rather, Jacob's wholeness was in his holistic approach towards these diverse spheres.
People think that the pursuit of excellence in one field entails neglecting other areas. A person who seeks perfect health and physical strength will come to the realization that one needs money to attain this goal. But the pursuit of wealth can become such an all-absorbing goal that it may come at the expense of one's original objective – good health. Ironically, the anxiety to acquire wealth can end up ruining one's health.
It is clear that both good health and financial security help provide the quietude needed to refine character traits and attain intellectual accomplishments. However, these different areas, instead of complementing one another, often compete with each other. We suffer spiritually when our desire to strengthen the body and cultivate social living (which requires certain financial means) are not understood in their overall context.
The perfection of Jacob – the "ish tam," "the complete man" (Gen. 25:27) – was in his ability to live in a way that no single pursuit of excellence, whether spiritual or material, needed to contradict or detract from other personal goals. On the contrary, when they are understood properly, each aim complements and strengthens the others.
This is the profound message of the Talmudic statement. Jacob was whole in body and wealth, and from both of these together, he found the inner resources to be whole in Torah. Jacob exemplified the trait of emet, truth - "Give truth to Jacob" (Micah 7:20). He demonstrated how, in their inner depths, all accomplishments are united together; all reflect different facets of the same inner truth.
(Gold from the Land of Israel, pp. 73-74. Adapted from Ein Eyah vol. III, p. 209)
Monday, November 11, 2013
Samuel Mohilever
Samuel Mohilever
Thursday, November 7, 2013
Torah tells you how to live. It doesn't replace life.
So too not allowing BTs to date. Many try to replace companionship and sex with religious observance and find themselves disappointed with that observance when it fails to deliver.
Torah tells you how to live. It doesn't replace life. And why should it? God created life just as He created Torah. He doesn't hate life. Many people take the Torah only idea to absurd degrees where they are not even living anymore. This is lunacy. It's cultist.
Torah also doesn't replace mental health, even though if taught correctly, it can help fix it. When an unstable person tries to find get instant Karma sanity in Torah, he often fails. You have to work on mental health issues as health issues. Torah life can give a good framework for healing, but the healing is a separate effort. Studying Gemara does not cure mental illness. It can even worsen it. Derech eretz kadma l'Torah. You have to get your sanity back before all the intense study.
Monday, November 4, 2013
Not Torah Only
Friday, November 1, 2013
R Shach's Haskama for book on R Azriel Hildesheimer
(Haskama to 'Hiddushei Rabbi Azriel: Yevamos, Kesubos', Jerusalem 1984)
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
Must You Have a Rav?
So the following is going to seem radical. We hear all the time that you have to have a rav. You are asked, do you have a rav. You are advised, don't marry anyone who doesn't have a rav.
Here's what I want to say about that. It's wonderful if you can find a good rav. That's the concept of mentorship. The whole world understands that.
However, you do not have to have a rav. You may simply not be able to find one. There are all sorts of reasons for that. Here are some:
1) People including rabbanim are lacking in wisdom today. The world has become so complicated. Who is really broad and learned enough to navigate it for himself no less for others.
This becomes more complicated with baalei teshuvah. How many rabbis understand baalei teshuvah and the complexity of our journey. How many don't try to just turn you into a Haredi FFB? How many follow the Reb Yaakov principle of "helping to keep mitzvot" that I have posted at the top right of this blog?
2) People are busy. They are so busy. The world today is out of control busy for everyone. Orthodox Jews carry a double load. In the old days, your 10 kids bopped around the farm. Today, everyone needs a ride to school, help with homework, etc. That's part of it.
Also, we have become a cold society. Corporate. People aren't that interested in each other. We are really lacking in love and concern for others. We form organizations, but on a one to one level, we are really lacking.
I'll be frank and confessional here. I have lived in all sorts of towns, been part of all sorts of shuls. Rarely, did the rabbanim have any time for me. 30 seconds here and there. A fifteen minute appointment a year. Just no time. It is rare that I ever even received a Shabbos invitation to the rabbi's home. Actually, it happened just once throughout all the decades. I had been living in the town for a year and half and I was a bochur! And as you can expect, I am not the type who is invisible in the shul.
It's worse with the rabbis not in your town. As a Sabbath observant Jew, you can't stray too far from your home. What if the local rabbi is not your cup of tea? What if you are not his? But what's the alternative? It is very difficult to strike up a relationship with rabbis who don't see your face often. I can't explain the reasons, but I have found that rabbis don't take an interest in people who are not congregrants in their shuls. I have contacted dozens of people who I located over the Internet or by reference and have experienced nearly no interest. Two minutes on the phone. A few times I got back a brief email. Nothing ever after that. No how's it going or hey, I found something you might like. I have traveled an hour an a half to shiurim to people I contacted prior with emails and still barely a hello, certainly no kind of conversation. It's shocking. There have been a few exceptions to this, one who made alot of time for me and another who sent me a few things. But95% of the time nothing or next to nothing. It's very strange.
I have been shocked at times that these gentlemen didn't pick up on the fact that I might be looking for a rav, that I gravitated to them for a reason. Any rabbi who tells you that you need a rav better also be picking up talmidim of his own. I suspect that many do not, other than those who are paying dues in the shul or tuition at their school. You get my drift.
3) You might be too complicated to align perfectly with a single person. Maybe the answer is to have multiple rabbanim or mentors or confidants. You can use books too, you know. The answers to many of our questions are found in books. Most rabbis just give you the answer that they found in a book anyway. Once upon a time there were no books. Now we have lots of them and you can use them as rabbis.
4) You might be too intelligent for your local rabbi. You might be too worldly. A BT has seen alot in life. I'm not talking just about travel, but life experience. You have experienced total life transformation. Does the rabbi understand that necessarily?
The goal here isn't to disparage the rabbinate. It's to say, you might not be able to find a rav. Don't sweat it. It's not one of the taryag mitzvot. Do the best you can, like with anything.
I look at it like this. It's the end of days. People are nuts. Things are a mess. The rabbis are what they are. Maybe many are trying really hard. What really makes it the end of days is not just that it's hard to find a rav but that people expect to you when it's not feasible. That lack of logic is really bitter.
Some people find good rabbanim. Some swear by them. That's fine if it is truly productive. I have tended to not fit into either the Haredi or Modern derech so I haven't aligned too well with rabbanim either. If there were a Torah Im Derech rav I'd do much better. Haven't found that. I have learned that it's not good to force it. You'll try to force it if you think you must have a rav.