cooler heads

Some rabbis are so out of touch with the concerns of people that it is appalling. I once attended a talk given to a Carlebach minyan where a visiting rabbi told a room of music lovers that listening to music has been forbidden since the destruction of the Temple, except for zmiros at Shabbos tables and some music at weddings. Rabbi Shlomo Carelbach was a talented songwriter and performer who built an entire kiruv track based largely on music. People who follow his derech connect to Judaism largely through music. I do not know what this rabbi was trying to accomplish with his presentation, but he certainly risked pushing people away from Torah observance. I know this rabbi to be a gentleman, but he was trained to impose Judaism like a straight jacket. Incredibly, he is Modern Orthodox and is associated with Yeshiva University, but many rabbis in the Modern Orthodox world have taken on sensibilities of other groups even though they are paid by Modern Orthodox people. 

But cooler heads can prevail. One BT who was an aficionado of opera was most upset to hear that halacha prohibited him from attending operas because he'd hear women singing. The rabbi who gave him this news eventually took him to a prominent posek  who told him if I recall correctly that attending operas would be permitted to him if his interest was in the entire spectacle, not just the women singing. After the young man left the room, the posek took the rabbi aside and chastised him, saying that he should know better than to pass on such restrictions without checking for a leniency.