Love matters

Took me a lifetime, but I learned that love is more important than career. I’m not talking only about romantic love or family but friendships too. You’d think any fool would know that, but this fool did not. I remember my friends all disappearing to colleges far from home, most never returning. They had dreams. As Harry Chapin sang - She was going to be an actress and he was going to learn to fly. That’s how we were programmed in school where the government stuck us. We were force fed ridiculous dreams. I saw people leave true loves for dreams. I understand that you want out of your home- town, but you don’t have to go 3,000 miles. Don’t go so far that you can’t return, not unless it’s really bad, not unless you truly need to be somewhere far away. That happens to some of us, but not to most. There’s nothing to replace childhood friends and first loves. You thought you’d have a lifetime of it, but the future offered up strangers. The good people were already taken. And now you can’t go home.

The frum world has its own version of this. They laugh at love. You marry for frumkite or yichus or money. This is a kind of career. You marry resumes. You marry strangers. This is disgusting. Love matters.

I wrote the above and then saw the below.

                                             "Dreams Go By"

There you stand in your dungarees
Looking all grown up and so very pleased
When you write your poems they have so much to say
When you speak your dreams it takes my breath away

You know I want to be a ball player
A regular slugging fool
But both our dreams must wait awhile
Until we finish school

And so you and I
We watch our years go by
We watch our sweet dreams fly
Far away, but maybe someday

I don't know when
But we will dream again
And we'll be happy then
Till our time just drifts away

There you stand in your wedding dress
You're so beautiful that I must confess
I'm so proud you have chosen me
When a doctor is what you want to be

You know I want to be a painter, girl
A real artistic snob
But I guess we'll have our children first
You'll make a home, I'll get a job

And so you and I
We watch our years go by
We watch our sweet dreams fly
Far away, but maybe someday

I don't know when
But we will dream again
And we'll be happy then
Till our time just drifts away

Listen to the seasons passing
Listen to the wind blow
Listen to the children laughing
Where do broken dreams go?

There you stand in your tailored suit
So many years gone by, but you're still so cute
We take the car to go and meet the bus
When our grandchildren come to visit us

You say you should have been a ballerina, babe
There are songs I should have sung
But I guess our dreams have come and gone
You gotta dream when you are young

And so you and I
We've watched our years go by
We've watched our sweet dreams fly
Far away, but maybe someday

I don't know when
But we will dream again
And we'll be happy then
Till our time just drifts away

You and I
We'll watch our years go by
We'll watch our sweet dreams fly
Far away, maybe someday

I don't know when
But we will dream again
And we'll be happy then
Till our time, drifts away

You, you and I
We'll watch our years, years go by
We'll watch our sweet, sweetdreams fly

                                        Far away, maybe someday 

Harry Chapin again. He was way ahead of me.