A blog for people who seek alternative approaches to kiruv and the baal teshuvah experience.
Saturday, February 21, 2026
Thursday, February 19, 2026
So why not be a Litvack then?
So if what prevails today is not Litvishism but rather Yeshivism, if true Litvacks honor all the Gemara, including teach your son a trade, 18 to the chupah, study what the heart desires, find a shiduch for an orphan, etc, then why not be a Litvack? If true Litvacks are not poisonous, why not be one?
It's a matter of style. Litvacks even traditionally are more focused on nigleh and analytics, less community oriented than Chassidim, less interested in the mystical and the tzadik. You can still be a good eved Hashem that way, and if it's your derech, then do it. But if you want more community and mysticism and connection with the tzadik, then Chassidus would be better. If you want more connection with humanity, if you find Hashem in nature and science, then you might be more of a Hirschian. Those are all valid derachim.
Yeshivism, in my opinion, you can do it if you want, but it's not Litvishism, even though the Yeshivists claim to be the heirs of Litvishism. They are imposters in that regard. They are doing something else. And maybe it works for many people. That's not for me to judge. But call it what it is. And don't insist that it's the true derech because it's the least true derech.
The source of the disease
It's interesting how similar shivists are to rabid zionists. Both can be nasty, mean, deceitful. They are not interested in HaShem. They toss away mitzvos. They can be perverse.
So much in common, people often see them as opposing one another. But they are two sides of the same coin. It's like the democrats and republicans. Same thing. All opposed to the people, all violating the constitution.
The root cause of the problem isn't zionism. Even under shivism there's a root cause. They turned from HaShem and His commandments. And so a nastiness emerges. The resulting disease took the form of shivism in some, zionism in others.
Stupid is as stupid does
Let us first distinguish between Litvacks and Neo-Litvacks. Real Litvacks honor the teachings of the Gemara. Rav Avigdor Miller is an example. What Torah should you study? You should study what your heart desires. So says the Gemara. So says Rabbi Miller. Most men should not be in Kollel. They should be working and studying some each night. So says the Gemara. So says Rabbi Miller. You should not disparage talmidei chochamim. You should honor the different groups of frum klal Yisroel. You can learn certain things from the gentiles. Everyone is created in God's image. Mitzvos are extremely important. So says the Gemara. So says Rabbi Miller. On and on it goes.
Over the last 70 years, the same period of time in which the state of israel has existed, Litvishism transmogrified into Neo-Litvishism. The change is so vast that it's unfair to even call it Neo-Litvishism. We shall call it Yeshivism. Yeshivism isn't a new form of Litvishism. It's a monster all its own. The word Litvish should be not be sullied via association. Yeshivism is as Litvish as the state of israel is Jewish. Yeshivism has as much to do with Litvishism as the state of israel has to do with the Kingdom of Israel. In other words, it's an imposter. It's identity theft just as the state of israel is identity theft. Shall we call it Shivism, after the India god Shiva, or as an allusion to sitting shiva for certainly these people kill all the life in you, using a shiv, a knife.
Shivists don't follow the Gemara. They claim to follow "the gadolim" who allegedly follow the Gemara, but they actually only follow leaders who follow them in their value system that is built on a handful of weird ideas.
Everything I listed above, they don't do. They don't study what the heart desires. They don't send out the boys to earn a living. They don't honor other groups.
What do they do? Stupidity. Everything about them is stupid. Everything. Their limiting of Torah study to lomdus on a few chapters of yeshivishe mesectos is stupid. Their refusal to study grammar or the Hebrew language is stupid. The refusal to teach young people the basics of the Mesorah is stupid. Their refusal to teach halacha is stupid. Their making being a gaon the purpose of life is stupid. Their approach to halacha and their deemphasis on mitzvos is stupid.
What else is stupid about them?
Their view of the person as basically evil. Their negativity about everything. Their hatred of the world. Their approach to shidduchim. Their approach to marriage. Their approach to rabbinic leadership (having a rav).Their choice of where to live (NY or Israel). Their approach to choosing a profession when they allow it. Their obsession with money. Their yeshivish speak. Their clothing. Their zmiros. Their complete ignorance about mental health, as a teenage girl said to me recently. Their lack of modesty. Their competitiveness. Their obnoxiousness. Their self-worship. Their attitude they only they have the truth.
I could go on. Name a topic of life and they are stupid about it. The irony is that they see themselves as geniuses, but stupid is as stupid does.
I mentioned that this stupidity is coterminous with the state of israel. The Gemara talks about the Three Oaths by which Klal Yisrael agreed not to take the land by force. Many in the yeshiva world embraced the state of israel or ignored the violation of the oaths by the Zionists, the punishment for which is extreme.
Why/What are these Three Oaths? One, that Israel should not go up [to the land] in a wall {i.e. en masse, RaShI interprets: forcefully}. Two, the Holy One adjured Israel not to rebel against the nations of the world. Three, the Holy One adjured the nations that they would not oppress Israel too much. (Kesubos 111)
The punishment for violation of the oaths severe:
“I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles and by the hinds of the field” (Song of Songs 2:7). Rabbi Elazar said: The Holy One, Blessed be He, said to the Jewish people: If you fulfill the oath, it is good, and if not, I will abandon your flesh (and all will devour you) like the gazelles and like the hinds of the field.
And that is what the shivists are doing to klal Yisroel, they devour everything: the chassidim, the yekkes, baalei teshuvah. They are the punishment for their own violation of the Three Oaths.
I advise you to stay away from them. Don't do stupid things, in stupid places, with stupid people. And they are stupid.
Monday, February 16, 2026
Friday, February 13, 2026
Thursday, February 12, 2026
Men comment on marriage







i have four exwives, they all changed, why would anyone think that the fifth would be any different? you think you can 'pick better' and its not going to happen, good luck with that


Amen

spot on!! Putting that bloody ring on her finger was the worse day’s work I ever did ! Moan moan moan !! 
So True. My wife definitely has control issues.
..1-kid she still has time to listen to other single-women, 2-kids its still easy to divorce claiming neglect....3-kids she is too damn busy and dug her own grave!! 
...3 kids she's committed now!!! That's their magic number.









). A bit of an eye opener!
My wife and I are still happy after 48 years, and although some things have changed with age, and there have been some trials and rough patches, our love and friendship hasn't changed, and the 10 things haven't happened with us, at least not in a big way.
I'm not commenting to make anyone feel bad, but I guess to say that there's hope that it can all work out.
I think what helped us the most was being totally open and honest with each other about everything, before committing to a long term relationship, and continuing that honesty throughout.
I admit however that there's also a large dose of luck involved in having two people meet that both share the same commitment to honesty.
