Bruce Springsteen explains the BT experience

 "Badlands"

Lights out tonight, trouble in the heartland
Got a head-on collision smashin' in my guts, man
I'm caught in a cross fire that I don't understand
But there's one thing I know for sure girl

I don't give a damn for the same old played out scenes
Baby I don't give a damn for just the in betweens
Honey, I want the heart, I want the soul, I want control right now
You better listen to me baby

Talk about a dream, try to make it real
You wake up in the night with a fear so real
You spend your life waiting for a moment that just don't come
Well, don't waste your time waiting

Badlands, you gotta live it everyday
Let the broken hearts stand as the price you've gotta pay
We'll keep pushin' till it's understood
And these badlands start treating us good

Workin' in the fields till you get your back burned
Workin' 'neath the wheel till you get your facts learned
Baby I got my facts learned real good right now
You better get it straight darling

Poor man wanna be rich, rich man wanna be king
And a king ain't satisfied till he rules everything
I wanna go out tonight, I wanna find out what I got

Well I believe in the love that you gave me
I believe in the faith that could save me
I believe in the hope and I pray that some day
It may raise me above these

Badlands, you gotta live it everyday
Let the broken hearts stand as the price you've gotta pay
We'll keep pushin' till it's understood
And these badlands start treating us good

For the ones who had a notion, a notion deep inside
That it ain't no sin to be glad you're alive
I wanna find one face that ain't looking through me
I wanna find one place, I wanna spit in the face of these

Badlands, you gotta live it everyday
Let the broken hearts stand as the price you've gotta pay
Keep movin' till it's understood
And these badlands start treating us good

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Badlands, whoa whoa whoa whoa
Badlands, whoa whoa whoa whoa
Badlands, whoa whoa whoa whoa
Badlands, whoa whoa whoa whoa
Badlands, whoa whoa whoa whoa

it is a culture of abuse

 Had to drop something off in shuls last week. I went into three at the time rabbis were talking to the men there. Every one of them was barking, scolding. Am I too sensitive? I don't know, I think that's the culture today -- rabbis - at least some of the yeshivish ones - scold the men. Seems abusive to me. Certainly, it's all din. 

'Every trip I've taken, there was a problem': Former Titan Titanic travellers reveal issues

 'Every trip I've taken, there was a problem': Former Titan Titanic travellers reveal issues - YouTube

Reminds me of BT schools, lots of fakery and fooling people. 

How Cults Control the Minds of Followers, and How to Escape Them, with Dr. Stephen Hassan

 How Cults Control the Minds of Followers, and How to Escape Them, with Dr. Stephen Hassan - YouTube

money for Torah

Anyone who believes in his heart that one ought occupy oneself with Torah and not work, but support oneself with charity, behold, this one desecrates the Divine name, dishonors the Torah, extinguishes the light of faith, brings evil to oneself and forfeits life in the world to come, because it is forbidden to benefit from the words of Torah in this world. (Mishneh Torah)

Rambam says that taking money for Torah extinguishes the light of faith. How does that work? Dovid HaMelech said, "All Your mitzvot are faithful." (Tehillim 119) They bring us to faith. The money for Torah business has created an ethic that mitzvos don't matter very much. What matters is Torah study. |This is how many fundraisers, Roshei Yeshiva among them, believe that they must craft their message. They push aside mitzvos and rave on all day long about Torah. That's how you get baalei batim to give their money, you tell them that Torah is everything and since they don't have much time to study it, they'll gain a share in it by donating their money. This diminishes mitzvos and extinguishes the light of faith. It is reminiscent of the Catholic Church pushing its members to give money to the Church to attain salvation.

But it's a mistake. Baalei batim face challenges in mitzvos from being out in the world. They struggle daily with a 1000 tests of honesty, with getting to Mincha, with kashrus, with remembering that parnassah comes from Hashem, with assimilation to the gentile culture that surrounds them, and with issues concerning the opposite sex -- men not staring at women and women being modest. Whether or not they handle these correctly (and with mitzvos deemphasized how could they?), they feel guilt in their hearts. Some can't handle the guilt and turn cold toward the entire religion to numb themselves.

If Torah is presented according to the translation of the word -- instruction -- then it becomes relevant to their lives. Oh, the Torah will guide me in all of these situations. The Torah will inspire me in faith. This is more effective than tired old speeches about the sweetness of the daf, the magic effect of deep lomdus on the higher worlds, or the majesty of gadolim. That talk sounds thrilling but rings empty for many. It's hard to get true sweetness of the daf in an hour or in a daf Yomi shiur which consists mostly of passive listening. The baal habayis doesn't see gadolim very much, if at all. You can't build the whole religion around the sight of them. 

We can talk about Torah but in a way that connects to the mitzvos that baalei batim are concerned about. Then, we are not extinguishing the light of faith. My expectation is that this approach will lead to bigger donations because we are speaking to people in a way that resonates with them rather than in a way that speaks to people who are currently in yeshivos all day long and don't face the same kinds of challenges. 

shoftim

 Shoftim are leaders. They get their power after being anointed, which shows a distinction that results "from their works." Shimshon was a Nazir too and his Nazirus highlights his distinction, his independence. Shoftim had military strategies but their power is from their "kedushah." Shimshon fought battles by himself further hightlighting the separation that comes from distinguished actions. R' soloveitchik)

So the Manalists have swapped 'their works' for Brisker lomdus and switched distinct ion through avodah to cloistering and not caring about the world. 

All of life to them is gemara lomdus so you wind up actually not doing works. 

reasonable

God does not place excessive demands on His creations. 

Lubavitcher Rebbe

https://youtu.be/JZZ1ou7jkTk

you must love the abuse

 bochur goes to famous mashgiach and asks can i learn musar with you? mashgiach says, you are only interested in being able to brag how you learned with the mashgiach. weeks later mashgiach says, you said you wanted to learn musar, so we did, and i haven't seen you since.

this is meant as an inspiring story, but i think it's sick. why assume the worst, the bochur is ONLY interested in bragging? then when he doesn't relish the abuse, he's criticized again for not relishing the abuse.

when you start relishing the abuse, that's when your life is over, when these people have turned you out as they say in prison talk. from that point on, you will have no instincts, no logic, and no dignity.