Financial and life advice

The goal is financial independence not wealth and certainly not super-wealth. Super-wealth is amongst the rarest of brachas and aiming for it can leave you broke. Live simply, save your pennies, and look to start your own business - that is the best way to financial independence. Sometimes your own business means a partnership with others. That's fine. Sometimes it means rising high in an organization - but that is a hard road and usually involves losing your personality and values. Many more achieve independence with their own businesses. Get married. Brachos stay with you via the woman. But get a women who lives in reality, lives simply, and understands that money doesn't grow on trees and happiness doesn't come from high living. Don't marry anyone else unless she comes with a trust fund. Trade looks for good values.

If you are middle or lower class, put some money in your simple home and some in index mutual funds. Some in the USA, some in Europe, some in Asia. Put some of your cash in foreign currency, especially the strong ones like the Swiss Frank. Take 5-10% of your money and gamble in the stock market but no more than that. You'll likely lose it. The market is pretty rigged.

Don't bury yourself in your work, especially if you are working for someone else. Work hard but not too hard. Someday that someone else will burn you, that's before or after he has gotten rich off of you and others like you.

Don't aim to learning full time. Learn in the morning and night and work in the day. That's normal life. If you find 10 million dollars in your bank account, we can talk about adjusting that schedule. 

Know that college is mostly a scam, a way for children of the rich to enjoy themselves as they conduct research that you pay for. Don't borrow for college. Go to a public college at night preferably online while you work and build real skills. Major in something that will lead to earning an income. You can educate yourself just fine with books and online lectures. 

Do some chesed, make it 10% of your life if you want, but your primary responsibility is to yourself and your family (presuming your goal is to live simply). That's not selfish, it's survival. We are talking to working people here, not ones who go on cruises. The rich need to do much more. 

Your swing

Don't change your swing. It's what got you into the big leagues. Just change where you stand in the batter's box - Pete Rose

The relevance to BTs is obvious. The frum world has a certain culture, or a few similar cultures, that are incidental to Halacha or even Avodas Hashem. You don't have to alter  your personality. Obviously we try to improve ourselves, clean up the language, reduce the secular references when in a group that isn't familiar with it. But you keep your personality. You don't have to become frummie. And you can keep your secular wisdom and benefit from it. Don't change your swing.

Real Chizuk

I just listened to an interview that was supposed to address the question of how a person who feels hopelessly mired in sin can do teshuvah. And the answer given was a tirade against contemporary permissiveness and featured the line "your life isn't your own, it belongs to God" (paraphrased a bit).

I wasn't surprised. Whereas I can find all kinds of Xtian ministers giving pep talks to the despairing, the frum world seems incapable of it. I recall a talk at Ohel given some years ago where several rabbis were supposed to give support to a boy who was abused by his brother and responded that the boy needed to do teshuva.

There is a darkness sitting upon the frum world. It's din gone haywire. We have become incapable of giving chizuk.

I went to a talk a few years ago that was entitled something like tips for learning Torah with your son. And the talk was all about how a rav becomes the kid's true father.

What has happened to us? For a person who doesn't know better, the religion can seem like one big assault of din. Is there any love in Judaism?

The Modern Orthodox days justifying killing of Palestinians. The Yeshiva world just pummels everybody with authority and threats and ridiculous expectations. The Chassidic world I don't know so much about as they talk Yiddish.

So let's address it. To say your life isn't your own has a certain philosophical truth but don't take it too far. God owns your life but He gives it back to you when it says in Pirkei Avos, if I am not for me, who is for me, and raise the child according to his way. Your life is yours under the guidance of God. Anybody who tells you that in absolute terms your life isn't your own doesn't believe the same about himself. He's trying to own the both of you. And yes, we see that Menashe did teshuva even though he killed scores of people. There is hope for all of us. What matters most, says R' Miller, is what you are in the end.

As for the abused boy doing teshuva, that is just stupid. And the rabbis who talked that way were famous names. They are so out of touch, so lost. They don't know how to comfort. He was not bar mitzvah for one thing. And even if he were, he was dominated by an older brother.

The rav teaching Torah becomes like a father in small dimensions. Let's not get carried away. These things aren't to be taken literally. A good father teaches the basics of Torah life and those are everything. The Vilna Gaon always gave honor to the teacher who taught him aleph-beis.

Sigh. So sad what we have today.

For a shiduch

Q: Where should one take a girl for  a date?
A: I imagine he means for a shidduch. You don't go for dates! For a shidduch. The best place that costs the least money is Grand Central Station. That's not private, it's a kosher place, and there's no admission, it doesn't cost anything (R' Avigdor Miller, #486 in Q&A 2, p. 88)

Advocated grammar study

About Rabbi Shabtai Sofer of Przemysl(According to Professor Avraham Berliner, Professor David Kaufman, and Reb Yosef Kohen Tzedek.)
Rabbi Shabtai Sofer, who was mentioned by Professor Schorr by the name of Moshe the Grammarian [Mosze Gramatyk in Polish – ed.] – apparently due to an error with respect to his first name – was a native of Przemysl. He became known as a scholar and a writer throughout Poland, and even outside its borders, especially in Czechoslovakia, due to his literary activities. His birth date and death date are not known, but we know some dates from his life. He wrote a poem as an introduction to the important book “Mateh Moshe” of the famous Przemysl rabbi, Rabbi Moshe the son of Avraham “Met”, which was published in 1591. It is also known that he composed the large, 45 stanza Selicha in memory of the martyr Reb Moshe Szmukler who was burned in Przemysl in the wake of the religious libel of the year 1630^[iii]
However, the major literary activity of Rabbi Shabtai Sofer was not expressed in the writings of Selichot or poems as introductions to books but rather in scientific research according to the methodologies of the times. These were research works into the theory of grammar, and glosses on the works of the great grammarians Rabbi Moshe and Rabbi David Kimchi (the RaDaK). His glosses were accepted by the scholars of Prague who used them in their works.
In addition to this, Rabbi Shabtai dedicated himself to research into the version of prayers of prayer books, especially in the Siddur (prayer book) that was in common use in Poland, in order to determine the errors and inconsistencies that crept into it throughout the generations. He inspected every dot and dagesh^[1], compared them with old manuscripts, and explained them according to his grammatical theories. His stylistic notes on every letter and dash in the Siddur served as the foundation of his valuable research book. He also authored an emended Siddur with explanations. After the publication of the Siddur, the Council of the Four Lands (in 1617–1619), in a circular to all the communities of Poland, requested to obtain at least one Siddur of Rabbi Shabtai for the entire community, so that the prayer leader could use it to conduct services and according to which all the members of the community would be able to emend their Siddurim. This Siddur won the approbations of the greats of that generation. The Siddur was first published in Prague. Due to its great value, it sold out ten years after its publication. At this time, there are apparently no remnants of that edition. The Siddur was published for a second time in Lublin many years later.
There was no follow–up to this historical research work into the formulas of the Siddur. After the death of Rabbi Shabtai Sofer, there were several unsuccessful attempts to publish his work in Western Europe by those who appreciate it. The book found its way to England in some unknown fashion, and is found in the library of the Rabbinical Seminary of London. At the beginning of the 20th century, Professor Dr. Abraham Berliner, one of the great Jewish scholars of Germany, took it upon himself to publish this manuscript, which consisted of 450 folio pages. Berliner published the book in 1909 in Frankfurt am Main, and added a preface in German, with details on the life and literary activity of Reb Shabtai.
Even before this he was held in esteem by Rabbi Yosef Kohen Tzedek, Professor D. Kaufman, and the great expert in manuscripts, M. Neubauer. From the aforementioned preface of Professor Berliner, we learn, among other things that Rabbi Shabtai, even though he did not occupy himself with deciding halacha, wrote several responsa of questions that came to him on matters of religion. These earned great acclaim. He also published a
[Page 39]
book on religious law and jurisprudence. This man is apparently also worthy of esteem in this area, for Rabbi Meir (the Maharam) of Lublin agreed, despite his own busy schedule with questions and responsa, that he could turn to him in any case of doubt, and he promised to give him an answer.
The relations between Rabbi Shabtai and the great rabbi of Przemysl, the Mateh Moshe, were good. He knew Rabbi Shabtai from his youth and held him in great esteem. According to Professor Berliner, there was a certain case where Shabtai publicly expressed an opinion contrary to that of the Mateh Moshe.
Rabbi Shabtai apparently went blind after the year 1630. 39 years had elapsed from the time he wrote the introduction to the book Mateh Moshe until he composed the Selicha, and then he lost the sight in his eyes in his old age.

---

Original Footnotes

1. That are not included in the article on the rabbis. Back
2. See the chapter “Sources”. Back
3. See the chapter “Sources”. Back

Translator's Footnote

1. A ‘dagesh’ is a dot in the middle of some Hebrew letters that can change the pronunciation of the letters. Back

Coordinator's Footnotes

1. An extensive pilpulistic commentary to the Hagadah.
   Rabbi J.J. Halberstamm, the late Grand Rabbi of Klausenberg was often wont to refer to this Hagadah and saw to it that it was reissued in order that “youth will appreciate the complete their husbands, resulting in children absorbing a disdainful atmosphere. He also chides women for their maltreatment of those in their domestic service. Throughout, the author reproves and castigates those “who Talmudic mastery and acuity of the sages of the 18^th century.” (Silberman edition, Brooklyn, 1980). The composer of the Brith Mateh Moshe often digresses to bemoan improper social behaviors of his time (he expresses shock of the satiric parody Masechet Purim); he criticizes women who insistently harangue cause many of the social ills of (the) time, a result of a haughty bearing and slothfulness over ethical behavior.”
   R. Moshe, a disciple of Rabbis Moshe of Horodna and Mordecai Ginzburg of Brisk, states he was originally a member of the Chevra Kadisha of Yehudah Chasid. This fact, as well as his interesting, descriptions of the personalities in this fellowship, has escaped the notice of recent scholars. See Z. Shazar (Rubashov), Reshumoth, Vol. II (1927) pp. 461–93; G. Scholem, Beit Yisrael Be–Polin, Vol. II (1949) pp. 36–56; A.Yaari, Shluchei Eretz Yisrael, pp. 322–3; E. Carlebach, Divided Souls (2001) pp. 84–85. (https://www.kestenbaum.net/docs/Auction_29.pdf) Back
2. see also: https://books.google.pl/books?id=EAiwCQAAQBAJ&pg=PA16&lpg=PA16&dq=MET+MarbitzeiTorah&source=bl&ots=FiGUkfRC3E&sig=gIlZE0avdSXOvblo94AwvQRaQ4E&hl=pl&sa=X&ved=0CDUQ6AEwA2oVChMIqt2OnL2txwIVY6ZyCh1Z3QAX#v=onepage&q=MET%20Marbitzei–Torah&f=false Back

---

[Page 40]

https://www.jewishgen.org/yizkor/przemysl/prz037.html
===========================

https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/kargau-menahem-mendel-ben-naphtali-hirsch

KARGAU, MENAHEM MENDEL BEN NAPHTALI HIRSCH (1772–1842), German rabbi and author. Kargau was born in Prostibor (Bohemia) and studied under Nathan *Adler and Phinehas *Horowitz in Frankfurt, Ezekiel *Landau in Prague, Joseph Yoske in Posen, and Herz Scheuer in Mainz. For some time he engaged in commerce in Paris, later returning to Germany and settling in Fuerth, where he devoted himself to the study of Talmud. He became friendly with Abraham Benjamin Wolf *Hamburg, in whose works Simlat Binyamin (Fuerth, 1841) and Sha'ar ha-Zekenim (ibid., 1830), many of his halakhic statements are quoted. Kargau wrote hymns and poems, including a hymn in Hebrew to celebrate Napoleon's coronation (Shir u-Mizmor (Paris, 1805) with a free translation into French by Michel Berr). In 1840 he commemorated Moses *Montefiore's return from Damascus in another Hebrew hymn. Kargau died in Fuerth. His commentary on Shulhan Arukh, Yoreh De'ah, 201 (dealing with the laws of the mikveh) together with 41 of his halakhic responsa, was published after his death by his pupil Jonah Rosenbaum and by Asher Anschel Stern, later chief rabbi of Hamburg, under the title Giddulei Tohorah (Fuerth, 1845).

BIBLIOGRAPHY:

S.M. Chones, Toledot ha-Posekim (1910), 135; D. Hoffmann, Der Schulchan-Aruch (1894²), 39; Loewenstein, in: JJLG, 6 (1909), 212–4, 230–3; 8 (1911), 118f., 204–6.

Laws of Torah Study 4:2

The Shulchan Aruch Harav says that Torah study is a commandment even when not leading to action. And it's impossible to fulfill other mitzvos without Torah. (See chap. 5 and 37 of Tanya for the advantages of study). Therefore study takes precedence unless a mitzvah cannot be done by someone else. Study is the greater mitzvah. However, it is equal to all the others only because study leads to doing them.

The suggestion here I believe is that when you do a mitzvah the study is behind it. Therefore the study leads to its own mitzvah plus the one it lead to. Therefore it will be equal to all the others because in each one there is study. It's simple math. I study 10 mitzvahs. Then I perform 10 mitzvahs. In each one of these sits the 10 acts of study. My study yielded 10 mitzvahs of study and 10 mitzvahs of action. So my study is equal to all of my action.

They come to learn, but not to teach.

Question is ha-Kodesh Baruch Hu according to this gentleman stated that He did not want the Erev Rav. Now, to tell you the truth. I have to admit, I don't recall this statement, so I'll take your word for it but it's only a figure of speech. Because the Gemara does say that we want geyrim. But it means that there are two attitudes. You should have taken them with great caution and once you accepted them you should have made certain that they exercised no authority. They come to learn, but not to teach. If a ger comes in to teach, then that's the wrong kind of ger.  (Rabbi Avigdor Miller, "The Keg and the Serpant." #052, 1:02:38)

[You can argue the same with BTs from highly assimilated homes]